Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Parasite ID test results in!

Right now I'm going to touch on a creepy subject that most of us hope we never have to think about as long as we live- parasites. The idea of a slimy alien squatter taking up residence in our bodies isn't exactly a comforting thought; in fact it's downright terrifying! Ever watched that show "Monsters Inside Me"? If you haven't you really need to! If you have, then you know what I mean! So you can only imagine my horror when I discovered a UFC (unidentified foreign creature) one day after a trip to the porcelain throne. Not only was the discovery completely horrifying, but the task of fishing it out was equally unpleasant! But here was a SOLID lead. It could be the answer to the extreme intolerances, weight loss (and inability to gain despite an insatiable appetite) and many of the other crazy symptoms I experience.

Here in the good old US of A (as well as a few other countries I know of)  it's almost impossible to find a doc who will even entertain the idea of parasitic infection as the cause of chronic illness. They believe that if you haven't recently traveled to a third world country and are not experiencing explosive diarrhea  then there's no way that you could be harboring an alien fugitive. This does not surprise me, considering I've been told by these "well trained" docs for years that I'm mentally ill and that there's no possible way that my adrenal glands could be tired. Oh yeah, and that my fibromyalgia is because I have "overactive" nerves. But ANYWAYS...

After carefully preserving the specimen in cryogenesis (the freezer), I made it my business to find a doc that would actually be willing to take me seriously and find out what kind of alien species this thing was. Luckily, I found Dr. Amin out in Scottsdale, Arizona. I was able to order my test kit from Parasitetesting.com for a very reasonable price and within days it arrived at my house. I placed the creature in the provided test tube and it was on its way to Arizona to be identified.

After a week of *patiently* waiting, I finally got a call from Dr. Amin's staff saying that my results were in. A half hour later I was on the phone with Dr. Amin himself discussing said results. It turns out that this creature was not in fact a creature at all, but a hardened, amorphous ball of mucous. I was both relieved and disappointed at the same time. Relieved to not be playing host to a bloodsucking creature, but disappointed because I thought I FINALLY had a real solid lead.

Dr. Amin was really great though. He spent the full consult time talking to me about the possible causes of these mucous balls and answering every question I had with PATIENCE. I didn't once feel like I was being rushed along, which was a breath of fresh air considering I was dealing with a doctor.

What he did tell me was that this was obviously not normal and that it was a result of SOMETHING irritating my digestive tract. He explained to me that right now I am like an oyster, chronically getting irritated by some sort of "sand". Only I'm producing booger balls as a result, not pearls. It's too bad...if I could produce some pearls I wouldn't be fighting for disability right now hah!! He said there is no doubt that there is inflammation going on, and that he usually sees this type of thing occur in people with chronic bacterial infections and not parasites. He did also say that food intolerances could also make this happen, but an infection will also worsen food intolerances. So its a chicken or the egg type situation.

So far doctors have referred to me as a canary, a zebra, a unicorn, and now an oyster. I'm starting to believe that I am just not human at all!

Although he could not confirm exactly what's going on without further testing, he highly suggested that I get checked for H. Pylori. Most of the stuff that he told me I had already had hunches about, but it was nice for once to hear from a doctor that I am on the right track and doing the right thing for myself by deciding not to just "take a pill".

So today I'm feeling bittersweet. My big lead turned out to be a farce, but it's one more thing eliminated and another step in the right direction. Yes, it was more money that I had to shell out, but in reality it was a better investment than the thousands I've already spent on these so called "specialists" that wouldn't even give me 15 minutes of their undivided attention.

So this oyster on to the next venture.. a complete GI analysis stool test.

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